Halloween
by Stephen Lynch, read by Wade Graham
Thinking of all the cool creatures
That I will meet, on this night.
Ghosts and goblins and witches
Roaming the streets, in moonlight.
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Bowls of candy and goodies,
Delicious and waiting, in store.
The sound of cute little footsteps
As they approach, my front door.
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Letting the children inside to drink beers,
Razor blades hidden in 3 Musketeers,
Screams from the basement of kids begging to be set free
That's what Halloween means to me.
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Tightening the clamps that are holding
Their little heads so tight.
Putting my lips to their ears
As I whisper, "please, don't fight."
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I promise I'll let you go home
If you swear not to tell, a soul
Well, I'll just untie these, I'm kidding,
Now, where is my chainsaw let's rock and roll!
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A pinch of your brother, a teaspoon of you,
With the head of your sister, would make a good stew.
I'd give you a taste, but your tongue's in the stew.
Irony! That's what Halloween means to me.
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Trick-or-treat, smell my feet,
Give me something good to eat.
Trick-or-treat, smell my feet,
Give me someone good to eat!
